05 Aug

Why Santa Cannot go Down a Chimney      By D E Lightful

Santa can’t go down a chimney because he’s too chubby and eats too much milk and cookies. Firstly, he can’t go down a chimney because what if the fire place is on? He will get burnt to a crisp!

Secondly, what happens if the fireplace door is locked closed? He will be stuck forever because he will not have the upper body strength to lift himself back up again out of the chimney.

Did you know that Santa is actually living in the North Pole at the moment making gifts and presents for us and every time he goes down a chimney he thumps to the ground and the family leaves milk and cookies for him and that’s a fact!

If Santa ever came down my chimney, I would not be very happy because he would break our fire wood and shatter the chimney even though I do not have one! But I do, well will, have a two or three story house but without a chimney or fireplace!

Why Santa Can’t Fit In The Chimney?           By Arwyn B

First of all, Santa is over weight. By many days of research, it is proven that Santa weighs approximately 4456kg. I think that is totally overweight! I don’t know why Santa is always in children’s books but what if there was a fire inside the fireplace? He could get burnt!

Or if the chimney door was locked? He’d be locked in! In my opinion, it is all lies, or as I should say, “ALTHBMU” (it means adult lies that have been made up)! I think it is totally rigged.

Secondly, how could kids believe in him? I think he is a total FRAUD! He also gives kids false hope and makes them look so forward to that night. And what is it with the red jump suit? If I was Santa, I’d wear a camouflaged suit.

And how exactly do the letters get to the North Pole? I have to watch all these stupid Christmas movies and then I find all these different fake facts. 

And don’t even get me started on the elves. The myth is to never touch the elf. I touch my elf all the time and it apparently is still able move. It is apparently so mischievous and puts flour all over the floor?  

Did you know that some kids in the world don’t actually get presents? As far as I can tell, Santa is made up. I think that the parents make it up so you can be such a sweet child during the year.  

I am disappointed in my parents for lying to me about the so called ‘Santa’!

14 Reasons Why it is Unrealistic for Santa to go Down a Chimney            By Lolly Lover

  1. Some chimneys are very thin and Santa is a fat fellow so he’ll probably get stuck!
  2. Santa will turn from cheery red to gloomy grey from touching all that soot. It’ll look like he’s a thief.
  3. There could be a fire on so Santa would die!
  4. If the presents are big, how would they fit down the chimney?
  5. Santa would probably yelp if he touched the ash and he’s not supposed to be noticed.
  6. Santa wouldn’t know when it’s the person/people’s bedtime and he is supposed to come out when everyone’s in bed.
  7. How could Santa open the door of the fireplace? There would be a handle on the other side so Santa would be completely stuck!
  8. The reindeer would slide and fall off the roof if it’s tilted! And Santa can’t fly, can he?
  9. Some people don’t have chimneys and it’s only right for Santa to go down chimneys. So, some guys won’t get any gifts. 
  10. Santa will most certainly be frowning as he delivers presents (because going down a chimney is nasty!). And if children find him growling, they won’t like Santa. Santa’s one goal is to make kids happy!
  11. If there’s smoke, Santa will be coughing and spluttering. That will stir up some chaos which is the last thing Santa wants!
  12. People are driving at night all the time and will definitely see Santa. They won’t know who it is and they’ll call the police. Uh oh, Santa!
  13. Santa would get tired after a while - wouldn’t we all? And he could fall asleep in a chimney. Then some kids wouldn’t get gifts!
  14. After Santa’s delivered the gifts, then what? He couldn’t go back up the chimney because he can’t fly! Santa couldn’t go through the front door because he’d make an awful racket, and he couldn’t go through any other door because his reindeer would be on the roof. So Santa is, therefore, stuck!
  15. In conclusion, I believe that it is VERY unrealistic for Santa to go down a chimney. I hope that after sharing my reasons with you, that you think, too, that it is unrealistic. So I guess that leads us to know that Santa isn’t real. Because, it’s just not possible! Santa is unrealistic and certainly not - not - REAL!
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